Skyrim
Grim Tales - A Princely Favor - Champion of Fenrir Book IV - Chapter  4

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38 comments

  1. AaronOfMpls
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    Hmm, no surprise Grim and Serana are getting off to a rough start, but Erik has been moderating them quite well. (I smiled to see Wolfgar getting into the act too, with his images. ) Whether or not Grim and Serana will ever like each other, I imagine they'll at least respect each other -- as I see Serana and Akrioh already do.

    And I see Serana isn't terribly pleased either that her party is mostly of the sausage variety.

    Well done as always, Jon, both pics and story! And on to the next...
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      Thanks and nice to see you around

      I based Serana a little off how Nataly wrote her in her stories. In her stories Serana has a lot of men issues and doesn't like them for the most part. But she may come around
  2. aok
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    Here we go!!
    Oh the banter is even better then expected! Grim and Serana clearly don't like each other but I can see on occasion they connect. I hope this will grow as they earn each others respect. I love how Erik is desperately trying to remain neutral, and is doing an amazing job of staying civil with Serana.
    Grim could learn a thing or two from him!
    I worry that Despair may be too much in Grim's weakened state.
    I also enjoy how you describe the mental images that Wolfgar sends! Brilliant!
    Loving this my friend!!
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      I am going in reverse hear on some comments so I know you made your way to the more recent chapter and have seen the big battle scene Thanks for the comment here and on the other stories - very much appreciated as I know it is a lot of reading to do!

      Writing Wolfgar is a lot of fun and I have been trying to give him a bit more focus. It is easy to just see him as a simple wolf (or even dog although he bites anyone who calls him a dog) but he is far smarter and way more powerful than just a simple wolf. He is an equal member of the party although I suspect only Grim and Erik truly see him that way. It is to hard for others (like Akrioh, Avrien, Serana, etc.) to really understand his nature.
  3. BlackMaid
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    Thank you for the nice start to my week. It`s a great story and the wonderful pictures are very well placed in this post. In my mind there was going on a film...
    The picture looking down to Grim and Serana from the balcony has a very nice perspective. Akrioh is a fantastic Dumner (wonderful close up)and the misty picture at last is what I like
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      Oh glad you liked that shot I used for the main image. I liked all the different angles and obstructions it had. I felt like the shot was taken by someone up in the balcony watching what was happening below. Appreciate the feedback on some of your favorite images as well as I am always curious which shots resonate the most with people.
    2. BlackMaid
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      Rather I meant the 5th picture, but the main has the same intention.
      The secret viewer on balcony is the novelist. It makes the story with pictures to one unit
      I hope , you understand what I mean with my poor english. I wished, I could it better express....
    3. wolfgrimdark
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      Hi - I understand what you mean I believe. Those shots are similar in many ways (had three top down view points). The person up on the balcony is the writer and perhaps the narrator (since I am telling the story mainly in third person - I seldom write in first person). And I believe you are saying that it ties the images and the story together into a single unit.
    4. BlackMaid
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      Yes, it is exactly that, what I mean
  4. Kamikazekossori
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    That bit with Minette at the beginning was quite cute, Erik trying to hide his smile as she showed her tip to Corpulus after his teasing words to Grim. Seems Erik is one to ponder things to the point of being restless, those worries waking him in the early morning as Grim still slept, though I understand him with the dangers that may lay ahead for Grim. I liked that part with that keen eyed Lisette watching Serana and Grim, seems being a bard has taught her well how to discreetly watch those in the inn, her kind spirit shown in that wink to Erik.

    Serena really has a way of not making the best of impression on people with tendency to speak her mind and barbed words, quite quickly waking Grim's anger in the first few words she spoke, not enough of Dannee's empathy has rubbed-off on her yet it seems. Was amusing how she was a little off-put by Erik's very different attitude towards her, not finding that same distrust in him. Serana sure finds herself in quite different company with Erik and Grim, so used to being with Dannee and Sofie as she is. That detail of the image shared by Erik was great, it sure is like a meeting of two alpha wolves that conversation between Serana and Grim.

    It is good that Dannee having had a few words with Sybille made it less of a challenge for Serana to get more information from her as they need all the information they can get to face a foe dangerous and careful as Despair. Seems a lot more shadows wander those marshes, always seemed a good place for an ambush, not many would necessarily see some kind of scheme in the disappearance of people with how treacherous that boggy ground can be, but that did not escape Sybille's attention. It is good to see that Serana held back some of her words, apologizing for snapping at Grim when he mentioned her mother, good that she sees the wisdom in trying to get along. Serana's knowledge certainly seems it was of great help and perhaps she will see the usefulness of Grim's skill eventually.

    Akrioh is an interesting sort, him finding only amusement in Serana's words after saying she would make a worthy foe, a confident hunter of the undead he is. The bit of tension in that banter was great. Seems his sense of humor has won over Grim with that joke about true daughters of Coldharbour. It is likely wise that Erik stayed out of the verbal sparring going on in the group, better not to somehow make it worse. That touch of mystery in the end with that unnatural fog drifting around them as they advanced, hiding what dangers may lie ahead, does make one ponder what is to come. Fantastic work, Jonathan
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      Hey there Alexi, thank you for coming by to check out Grim's latest adventure and providing some feedback/comments on it.

      Grim tends to be a good sleeper but Erik is a lot more restless these days and he is a bit worked up over their current situation. Two new team members to get comfortable with in a very short amount of time (although as a mercenary he is use to it somewhat) and then the issue with Despair.

      As for the bard, well there stock and trade is often telling stories and that means hearing news and gossip. However she has worked with Grim and Erik before so Erik is not to worried and nothing was really said that is vital to be private either. Erik and Lissette both had their own take on the battle of wills between the two alphas!

      As you noted the two of them got off to a rough start, which was expected, but at the same time Grim is a professional and a mercenary used to dealing with different clients. Still this is a different set-up so there is more tension than usual. At least they were both able to get some more information together and by pooling their resources now have a better idea of where Despair is.

      Glad you enjoyed Akrioh - he is rather fun to write as I have never had a character like him in a story before. As for the fog ... well you will learn more about that shortly. Chapter 5 is done - I just need to proof-read it and then I can publish it. Thanks again for the comment Alexi!
  5. deleted1123719
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    Nice continuation Jon. As expected, Grim and Serana certainly bumped heads, but I think both were far more restrained than I imagined (and I attribute that to the company they keep that has rubbed off on them; the benevolent Dannee and the calm Erik). Great jaunty tune in the tavern; I could almost SEE Lisette piping away on her flute making that jolly piece.

    So it seems like we're going to get a highly stylised version of the traditional Bethesda Dawnguard quest (flavoured by Wolfgrimdark's own poetic license). Nice. You know I love a stylised version of the vanilla quests. I'm really looking forward to seeing what they encounter at Castle Volkihar. The idea of the vamps stocking up on 'food' and experimenting with weres is a bit creepy. I'd have assumed you'd run with Harkon and his plans for world domination but that Dannee has already eliminated him. So it's Bal and Despair and their games but what exactly IS their game...

    Akiroh is a nice addition to the team. Not sure what voice he's using in your game, but when he 'speaks' i can just hear that dry vanilla Dunmer drawl. Love that voice type. He strikes me as quite a crusty old sort (Geralt comes to mind and that could be partly to do with his look, but also perhaps by the hints that he's no slouch with the ladies).

    Looking forward to what comes next....
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      Thanks for the comment and feedback Jess! The restraint between Serana and Grim is more from my lack of skill in doing good dialogue especially when I feel some pressure to write it a certain way. One of the things I really like so much about your writing is your dialogue - not just the flow of it but the distinct personalities of your characters.

      Writing descriptive narrative I find fairly easy and it flows pretty well when I write. Dialogue I have to struggle with. I have to think and push my brain a lot to come up with each line. That is not really a bad thing, as it makes me think, but it is a lot more effort (and draining) and take a lot more time. Hence why this chapter took a lot and there wasn't even that much dialogue in it.

      The other problem I have is with managing tension created by opposing viewpoints. As you probably recall with Avrien the tension between Grim, Erik, and Avrien was failry short lived. Some of that came from my need to compress everything (which is also in effect here - Serana is only a guest star for a single story line and not the entire book). The rest is just my struggle to maintain a certain level of antagonism between multiple characters. It takes more planning I think and a good mind for detail on remembering all the past conversations so that the two characters stay IN character and that their ebb and flow of hostility and attraction seems natural and real. Something you captured extremely well in your stories with Rathe and Fleur, and later Darius.

      I tend to stray into black and white, them and us, far to often. Something I am aware of but probably won't change much unless I start a fresh story with new characters where I plan out the entire relationship between them well in advance. That way I can use that time line to make sure I stay on target.

      Anyhow one reason I doubt I will ever write a real book as a book needs good tension between characters to help hold a readers interest and make it feel alive and dynamic. One thing I am doing more and more of, however, is paying attention to how other authors do it. Every book I read now my mind is more focused on how the author does the banter of characters and how they handle the various tensions in the relationships.

      Sorry long ramble but something I think about a lot and you picked up on it with the comment with Grim and Serana. For now I am just writing casual fan-fiction for Nexus so I try not to worry about it to much.

      In regards to the questline aye I am doing a very stylized version ... pretty much an overhaul. Some loose stuff - Dawnguard is there only this is the future of it. I went to the cave where the moth priest was only this was a place for doing experiments on werewolves. The castle is now a temple to Molag, taken over by Despair. Harkon is dead as is Kodlak. Somewhat like a year or two after all those stories are done. There may be a visit to the Soul Cairn (if time) but it will be to seek advice from Serana's mom (small spoiler but not a major one).

      Most of your questions will be answered in the next chapter. I was going to publish it tonight but debating how much information to reveal in it. I have the plot excuse to show it all, or most of it, but feels rushed at the moment. Then again this was meant to be only a 2-3 chapter story and already up to 5 and I expect it to go at least 7 chapters now.

      Akrioh does use the Dunmer voice and it is perfect. I wanted to keep him true to the mod authors vision so I am just building off that ... or what I feel it is at least. I enjoy writing him and having him along.

      Thanks again for the feedback and stopping by , very much appreciated Jess!
  6. Isleen
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    A wonderful chapter, perfectly written and a joy to read.
    Although I don't like vampires, I felt a bit with Serana. An intelligent woman with her aristocratic bearing and a bunch of animals. You webbed her thoughts about this situation around Eriks job to be a peacemaker perfectly.

    The shots are a wonderful work and the teaser for Chapter 5 makes me curious. I can't wait to see and read it.
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      Many thanks Isleen and glad you enjoyed it! Glad you enjoyed the shot and the story even though it included Miss Fang :-) I had some fun with the story although it wasn't as easy to write as my other ones.
  7. Heaventhere
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    I was just reading some post and found this had been posted, almost missed it . I keep forgetting about the track feature now in place.

    What a great chapter, and love the teaser!

    Serana born from the old aristocracy, a time when Vampires were truly feared and hunted but it seems to all I have read much smarter, they hunted only the ones who would not be missed, they did not or could not be out in the sunlight, or they would burn. I find the lore a bit missing on how Serana came to be or much on what the ritual that made her, I have looked a few times and find very little information but what there is is not at all nice. Maybe she has a reason to be in a pissy mood all the time she does not win friends easy and Grim is not one to be talked down to. Now Erik always the one to soften the scene when it comes to being the one between, working to make them all mold together, not for sake of the mission I wonder but more the sake of Grim, when he got up and dressed early he seems very worried as he seems to know Grim is not as strong and worries that Grim has not understood what he has lost. I wonder how this will all play out and as much as Grim respects and is Dannee's friend I wonder if he truely will ever be able to accept Serana as a friend. No matter what the outcome she is still the undead.

    I think I will like Akrioh, he has a way that even though he seems stern and unbending by his looks, his mind is quick and he does not fear in the least the more powerful Serana.

    Wonderful chapter and did very much enjoy the conversation and the shots were amazing .
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      The tracking is very useful. I still spend a few hours each week checking out random posts as it is the only way to find new people and images but I also like keeping up with a few key story writers that I like to follow as I have gotten caught up in their stories!

      Glad you liked this chapter and I agree the lore is missing a lot of things on Serana and her past. Perhaps they wanted to leave it very vague so people could fill it in as they wished (much like Nataly has). I don't plan on doing that myself as this is Nataly's version of Serana ... nor does Grim really want to spend any more time with her than he has (even if I personally don't mind her ... but hanging out with vampires isn't really my thing either).

      Erik is the peacekeeper here. I think he likes Serana actually although his real concern is for Grim and he would do what he has to to protect him. Plus he knows a team works better when it is built on trust and friendship so he is trying to foster that. He is very worried about Despair.

      Akrioh is boastful but not without good reason. Even with that he does not over-estimate himself or his opponents. Serana is not wise to under-estimate him for she knows nothing about him at all, or his abilities, beyond that he is a reknown undead hunter. That he has survived this long, however should give her something to think about. I can tell everyone that they should not underestimate this Dunmer.

      Thanks again for the comment and feedback Shelley!
  8. ista3
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    Awesome work and captures Jonathan
    1. frank213
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      I agree with you
    2. wolfgrimdark
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      Thanks very much for stopping by and checking out the shots Izzy and Frank, much appreciated!
  9. Nataly1q2w3e4r5t
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    This is awesome, such wonderfully written and emotionally filled chapter, a joy to read! Great shots too, very expressive and atmospheric and the last shot of Grim running in mist is just mesmerizing!
    I waited for Grim and Serana interactions with great deal of anticipation and apparently these two are like cat and dog, which also is often present between vampires and werewolves. Lore is yet to show the examples of friendship between such different individuals so hostility is more common. Grim and Serana acted accordingly, exchanging barbed words demonstrating their wits while poor Erik was forced to act as peace maker between two enraged parties.

    I think Erik is ore accepting of Serana is also because of his past... he helped his father in the inn and probably has seen all races and all kinds of people, so that might played a role in his more polite approach too. I've chuckled at Serana's reaction of being called 'ma'am'. Given her aristocratic heritage and her grumpy attitude she is sure can be called like that. And even with her crankiness, she could not hep but notice what a wonderful person Erik is.

    I think Serana was right to point Grim on her role that is similar to his at the case of hunting rogue werewolves at his part and her hunting feral vampires. Besides Serana really has given a finger to Molag Bal, doing a lot of good and seeing good people makes him literally sick. Of course for people like Grim and Serana is is not ease to change their view towards each other so suddenly but I think they can do so, even if they will make baby steps toward path of accepting each other...

    It was very interesting to see Sybille Stentor cameo and learn about her investigation. so vampires planed their assault a long time ago and no one noticed it... Of course getting Volkihar castle under Despair's control is bad news too, especially since it became a real stronghold by now with Valerica's fate left in shadows... no wonder that Serana is worried! But at least now she and grim also know that the Daedra described as embodiment of Despair and their Despair is the same person. Erik is right, she is not the one to be taken lightly, so most likely they will have a hell of the fight!

    I loved heroes scenes on nature, when they were making plans! I loved Akrioh and his sense of humor! He seems like just man too, not wanting to rush up with his impressions of Serana and the fact he is from Dawnguard add to his tolerant attitude. At first impression he seems like very stern, cold man with probably little sense of humor but i want to give him kudos for his playful speech about Molag losing control of his women, due to certain habits of his! It was priceless! And Serana of course can't help but call these fine gentlemen 'primates'... Dannee sure would have disapproved such rudeness. and now Grim and his team will have a lot of intense action ahead give the fact of strange fog appereance, which might indicate their enemies know they they have arrived...
    I would look forward for continuation and thank you very much for sharing you awesome work!
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      Thank you for the nice comment Nataly! I have been hoping my take on Serana has remained somewhat close to your idea of her, if not exactly. I have tried to not write to much from her perspective but for the sake of the story need to convey a few things from her viewpoint. I ended up having some fun with the conversation although it took more effort than normal to write it.

      I think Serana had the upper hand wit wise. But while Grim is smart he lacks the true ability of the aristocrat to make witty barbs as well as Serana does. Luckily Erik has done much work with soothing tempers and dealing with diverse people working at his fathers tavern as you mentioned. Erik also has taken to seeing her as a bit of a motherly figure, strange as it sounds. He did the same with Eir. Strong powerful women tend to do that to him, at least the ones that are nice and Serana has been nicer to him than she has to the rest.

      There is still a lot of friction going on between them but I tried to show a gradual warming trend between them. I have to compress things a lot - I do not have an entire book to very slowly draw them closer together in a long process, I have to do it quickly since I have only this one story line to build some mutual trust and connection - but wanted to show Grim grudgingly giving her some credit (and vice-versa). I doubt he will ever really like her but perhaps, just perhaps, he will gain some respect for her.

      Very pleased you enjoyed Akrioh as I had some fun with him. I have never written a womanizer character before so I took some hints from the Witcher series, since Akrioh is a little like that in personality from what JesusOden said about him (the guy who created him).

      Rather amusing that Serana is the only lady among the group. I am sure she feels surrounded by dumb animals
  10. Rincevent69
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    Great work on this set Jon! Your last shot, Grim in the mist , is just perfect for finish your chapter...
    1. wolfgrimdark
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      Grim in the Mist ... I like that A good title for the shot methinks. Thank you for checking out the story and appreciate the comment Tom!