About this mod

Milkman is a quest, companion, gameplay, and overhaul mod all rolled into one super-duper package. Drink milk, run a farm, and of course, become a milkman in what is undoubtedly the best mod ever (of all time).

Permissions and credits

Welcome to "Milkman", the mod that tries everything and accomplishes nothing.

So, what can you expect with Milkman?
FIFTEEN new quests (that's one more than fourteen!)
•NINE new perks (that's one less than ten!)
A FULLY VOICE-ACTED milkman companion (that's right, a mother truckin' milkman companion!)
FULLY FUNCTIONAL farm which you can run and upgrade (better get to work on that farmer's tan!)
A COMPLETE milk overhaul (so you can grow strong and tall!)
•MILKABLE Brahmin (touch their dangly parts!)

You'll find over four hours of new content in the mod, as well as new features that'll completely change how you play the game. Drink milk to boost various stats, upgrade your farm into an economical powerhouse, and become a MOTHER TRUCKIN' milkman. Also, poop jokes!

I already told you what's new, you ninny. That being said, however, let's go over all the new additions in detail (because my golly there's a lot of new brap).

There are fifteen quests in the mod spread between eight main quests, three mandatory side quests, two optional side quests, and two farm-related quests. Over the course of the main story, you'll become the New Vegas Milk Company's most trusted employee and assist them in complete world domination (through mind-controlling amoebas latched onto the lactose in the milk. Spoilers!). Once you've finished that, you can head right on over to Sunnyside Ranch where you can build your farming empire and become top dog in the Mojave's corn industry (or wheat industry, or white horsenettle industry, or Brahmin industry, or Bighorner Industry, or...). If that's not your kind of thing, well... you can drink milk now. Woo!

There are nine new perks in Milkman. They are, as follows:

1. Dangerous Game (companion perk)
While Jeremiah is a companion you will deal 50% more critical damage against Animals, Mutated Animals, Mutated Insects, and Abominations... but only while you are crouched!

2. I Got Milk (obtained through dialogue)
Anyone up for a nice, refreshing glass of milk? You can now milk Brahmin found in the wild and are capable of milking Brahmin on your ranch twice as efficiently!

3. King of the Road
You gain +25% damage, +10 hit points, and +10 to your lockpick skill so long as you have no companions (or cigarettes).

4. Lactose Intolerant (trait)
You suffer from lactose intolerance and cannot drink milk. On the bright side, a freak mutation has granted you tougher limbs and +1 STR!

5. Milkman (challenge perk)
All that time you've spent drinking milk has made your bones stronger and your limbs less prone to crippling.

6. Moonlight Serenade
Who knew you could be so romantic? You gain +2 Luck (up to a maximum of 10) and +25 Speech (up to a maximum of 100), but only while the sun is down.

7. Rather Be a Mule
You deal an additional 5% melee and unarmed damage for every Intelligence point you DON'T have. (e.g. An INT of 5 will grant a +25% bonus.)

8. Sh-Boom
Boom ba-doh, ba-doo ba-doodle-ay! Your Sneak Attack Criticals with explosives now inflict an extra 75% damage, because you use explosives while sneaking for some reason.

9. You Ain't Nobody
You're nobody until somebody loves you. You gain +10% critical hit chance, +10 Speech, and +3 DT so long as you have one companion.

During the main story in Milkman, players will encounter a new companion: Jeremiah Wehr. Not only is he an absolute beast with his custom-textured shotgun and a hit with the ladies, but he can also help the player with their cooking (that's right, your companion can now make you a sandwich).

Yes, you can now finally fulfill your dream of roleplaying extreme manual labor in Fallout: New Vegas! Grow and tend to a variety of crops and cattle or hire staff to do it for you. Afterwards, reap what you sow and make those big bucks on the market (with constantly changing prices)! If that's not your style, you can upgrade your farm and make it pretty... I guess.

At long last, you can drink milk. Either buy it off of the various merchants in the Mojave or milk it yourself from any of the local Brahmin. Different types of milk give different types of bonuses, so plan ahead and prepare!

Of course, if milk isn't your thing, you can always kill people! Milkman includes over fifteen new weapons, some of which are simple reskins and some of which have unique stats. Here's a few examples:

Overclocked Laser Pistol
Every new hire at the New Vegas Milk Company is given a trusty Overclocked Laser Pistol, provided by the New Vegas Milk Company's long-lasting partner, the Silver Rush! Charge up your shot to release a devastating blast of energy, vaporizing your foes to mere atoms!

Big Herder
This trusty trail carbine has been modified to fire explosive bullets, no matter the ammunition type used. In addition, critical hits have a 25% chance of summoning a friendly Brahmin to aid you in combat, so you'll never be lonely again! Yay!

As the famous saying goes, "mama said to knock you out". These shining-red boxing gloves deal fatigue damage to your opponents and have a chance to send them flying (literally, flying) to heights unknown!

Stop Sign
It's a stop sign.

It is recommended that you are at least level 15 before beginning the main storyline in Milkman. That being said, once you hit level 10 you'll be given a notification on where to start the mod. If you're too impatient to wait for level 10 and would rather get your ass handed to you, speak to Doyle Townsend at the Grub 'n' Gulp. He has his own cute lil' booth!

The farm is not tied to the main storyline whatsoever (though there's a few story elements shared between them). As soon as you load the mod, the map marker for Sunnyside Ranch will become visible (but not travelable), towards the bottom-right corner of your world map. Simply walk inside to start the quest associated with it. There's no recommended level for the farm, but keep in mind you'll be having to fight Fire Geckos and Lakelurks as part of the initial quest.

Of course, milk isn't tied to either of these aspects. To milk Brahmin simply walk up to them, crouch, holster your weapon, and press your Activate key. Before that, though, you'll need to obtain the "I Got Milk" perk by talking to Henson (located in The Prospector Saloon). In addition, once you've milked a Brahmin, you'll need to transport the milk from a bucket into a bottle by crafting the "Milk" item at a campfire.

Well, at this point (assuming you're a reasonable human being who likes milk) you're probably wondering how to install this wonderful mod. The answer is magic following these series of steps!

First, take note of the fact that Milkman violates Freeside like it's a cake at a six year old's birthday party. This means that it's unlikely to be compatible with any sort of "Open Freeside" mod (though I've never tested it myself). I know, I know. "But Testudini, I literally cannot breathe without an open Freeside!". Just think of it like this: what's better? No loading screens or FREAKING MILK? The answer is milk.

Alright, here's how you install the mod:
1. Download the mod from the "Files" section.
2. Unzip the file you downloaded into Fallout: New Vegas's main directory (the folder which has your Data folder and FalloutNV.exe. DO NOT UNZIP THE FILE INTO THE DATA FOLDER YOU NINCOMPOOP)
3. Move the contents of the "milkman" folder into your "Data" folder.
4. Open Fallout: New Vegas's launcher (do not start the game).
5. Go to Data Files and make sure that "milkman.esp" is checked.

There you have it! See, it wasn't that hard, was it?

Testudini (that's me!)
Everything not listed below.

Austin Banting
Voice of Ryan Seller.

Austin "Malastrome15"  S.
Voice of Jack the Brahmin King, Alejandro, Song, and Jerry Jr.

Beaver Man
Voice of Vince.

Benjamin Tyrell
Voice of Terrance Goodwill.

Elias aka "Ninjanub107"
Voice of Jeremiah Wehr.

Kate aka "ladyfabulousity"
Voice of Karen Humble, Phyllis Carolyn, and Maria.

Kyle "Stilichos"  Rasmusson
Voice of Timmy Carolyn and Michael Russell.

Mathias "TheLichruler" Schlienger
Voice of Carl Seller.

Oliver "Merc" Smith
Voice of Officer Nelson. Logo designer (he made that pretty Milkman logo, plus all the other logos in the mod!). Beta tester.

P4aNT0M aka "Jellisellis"
Voice of Lee.

Voice of Charles and various guards.

Voice of Doyle Townsend, Billy, George, Kevin, and Olaf.

Technical Assistance.

Revolver "Shalashaska" Ocelot
Revolver Ocelot

Q: What level should I be to start this mod?
A: As I mentioned earlier, level 15 is recommended for the main story.

A: First, you'll need to speak to Henson in The Prospector Saloon. He'll train you on how to milk Brahmin. After that, simply walk up to a Brahmin (while crouched and with your weapon holstered) and press your "Activate" key. If you're playing in hardcore mode, you'll need an Empty Bucket as well.

Q: Is the mod fully voice acted?
A: Unfortunately, no. I had several issues with several voice actors and a result many characters have gone unvoiced. That being said, there's still over a thousand voiced lines, so it's not like you're playing a silent film or anything.

Q: How long does it take to complete all of the quests?
A: If you factor in both the main story and the farm quests, it takes around four hours for me to complete the mod. It might take longer or shorter depending on your playstyle.

Q: Who are you?
A: I'm Testudini.

Q: Why did you make this mod?
A: I'm currently a seventeen year old high school student looking forward to majoring in Computer Science. I've had a love for video games since I was a young lil' lass in the fields of Arkansas. None of these are reasons why I made this mod. I made the mod because my friend told me I couldn't, so I did. Out of spite.

Q: I found a bug!
A: Then let me know!

Q: The quest markers are broken!
A: There's not much I can do about that. Gamebryo is a stupid engine and does stupid things. For the most part, it's pretty self-explanatory how to get to your objective. If it's not, just use the "movetoqt" command.

Q: I accidentally killed someone and now the mod's broken.
A: Well maybe you should stop accidentally killing people you nincompoop.

Q: I can't find the New Vegas Milk Company's headquarters!
A: It's down the street from the Silver Rush. If you're looking directly at the entrance of the Silver Rush, head left.

Q: I'm stuck!
A: The mod won't always be direct on what you need to do. Talk around and see what you can find out.

Q: Is this your first mod?
A: Yep.

Q: Are you aware that the word "INSTALLATION" on the Installation Banner isn't centered?
A: Yes. I hope it makes you suffer.

Q: Who's asking these questions?
A: No idea. I literally made them all up.

v1.10 (November 5, 2015)
-Added the ability to milk Brahmin.
-Updated the "I Got Milk" perk. It now grants the ability to milk Brahmin in the wild. Obtain it by speaking to Henson in The Prospector Saloon.
-Special delivery! Added a new weapon, "Explosive Milk". Obtain it by crafting it at a workbench.
-Added recipes for crafting the "Stop Sign" and "Pedestrian Crossing Sign" weapons at a workbench.
-Added a "Goodbye" prompt to Timmy Carolyn (again).
-Fixed several dialogue bugs.
-Fixed the quest "Green Thumb" not ending if the player had a well blueprint in their inventory.
-Fixed a certain character towards the end of the final quest being essential when they shouldn't have been.
-Fixed a bug where Carl Seller would run away screaming like a little girl at the sight of a mantis.
-Players will no longer have their controls disabled during "Check the Expiration Date".
-Updated the readme.txt file.
-Updated the credits.

-Fixed the bug where players were having fun with the mod. My bad!

v1.02.01 (October 21, 2015)
-Restored a missing mesh for the "Stone" building material. (thanks GeneralMarty!)

v1.02 (October 21, 2015)

-Fixed a bug where Doyle would occasionally wander off from his post at the Grub 'n' Gulp. (thanks stilichos!)
-Fixed a bug where Timmy Carolyn wouldn't have a "Goodbye" prompt. (thanks orribleeric, from reddit!)
-Removed the debug dufflebag used for testing after reminding myself for months to remove it before release.
-Updated credits.
-Reticulated splines.

v1.01 (October 20, 2015)
-Small fixes.

v 1.00 (October 20, 2015)
-Initial release.