11 comments

1. 

   buttnine

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   13 November 2014, 11:13AM

   Your writing is exquisite.
2. 

   AmadanBezerk

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   01 November 2014, 1:37AM

   This was bound to end badly, and now it has.
   Eyvind RAPED Aela, never mind their beast forms, and now Vilkas will do his utmost to kill him for that heinous crime.
   
   Endorsed.
   Thanks and cheers, dear!
3. 

   aok

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   28 October 2014, 5:16AM

   Uh-oh! This is bad, and to leave it at your trademark cliffhanger! This is one time I'm glad I'm catching up!
4. 

   wolfgrimdark

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   19 October 2014, 6:22PM

   Awesome intensity to this scene. I see you decided to make the companions werewolves close to the rogue ones in the wild (the difference being the Companions had more control over there change and could change at any time not just during the moon phase, unlike the ones in the wild - as the Companions curse came from the Hagravens and hence is a bit different than the "natural" ones). If you are using Moonlight Tales could be a fun way to go.
   
   Liked how Aela was FREEDOM as that seems to really suit her, as does strength for Farkas - who reminds me of a dog in many ways. He is super loyal, friendly, affection, and not all that bright. But try to hurt his family and watch out.
   
   You really captured the raw emotion in this story. The passion, the fury, the rape of Aela, the fighting. All seems to really get the idea of blood lust across. Well done!
   1. 

      deleted1123719

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      20 October 2014, 5:14AM

      YEah I felt like traditional weres that only shift with the full moon was the best way to go with this (so that Eyvind would feel so crap while he had to wait for the next full moon). Probably not lore friendly but that's what poetic licence is for!!
      
      I hope i'm doing justice to Aela, Farkas, Vilkas and the others (believe it or not but i've only played the Companions questline through once so I don't really know them all that well).
      
      As for the emotion and intensity in this chapter, well I hope it wasn't too much (I sometimes get carried away). I still want Eyvind to go in a certain direction and I don't want this dark chapter to define his personality in the future...
5. 

   Liadys

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   19 October 2014, 5:22PM

   Horrible mix of emotion going on in Eyvind mind right now, i don't see things going too well from now on..at least while Eyvind is still lost to his beast blood.
   
   Quickly off to read the next part !
   1. 

      deleted1123719

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      20 October 2014, 5:10AM

      Thanks hon. Yes, he's a huge bundle of raw emotion in this chapter. I didn't give him an exact age while all this was going on but in my head I see him at about 18 - 19... so he's got the whole teenage thing going on too!
6. 

   Kamikazekossori

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   19 October 2014, 3:28PM

   I see all that anger and jealousy he held in his heart had a dark effect on the way he took to that savage blood, the wolf within it nearly consuming his human side, him feeling his human was but a hollow shell to hold that form so strong, truly was a mistake to try to make him join the circle, one realized too late for him. Seems Eyvind truly learned to consequences of his mistake, Skjor and Kodlak carrying him out to be exiled, one that had carred for him turning her back on him along with his once fellow companions, truly a devastating moment for him and you depict that emotion so well, wonderful work again
   1. 

      deleted1123719

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      20 October 2014, 5:08AM

      Thanks dear one! It really means a lot to me when you comment so honestly. I DO try to inject a lot of emotion in my stories and sometimes I worry it's too much. This chapter gave me some pause as I wrote it as I have a very set idea where (and who) I want Eyvind to be and I don't want people to associate him forever with this one dark act. I hope everyone sees it the same as you have; that he made a huge mistake and must learn from it now...
7. 

   Anataron

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   19 October 2014, 12:47PM

   Oh my; you have a way of making life not easy for both your characters aswell as all People around them! very well done! off to the next one!
   1. 

      deleted1123719

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      20 October 2014, 5:04AM

      Yes I know. I have been called (affectionatly) the Queen of Mean around the Nexus!! Oh well. WHat can I say; if I were a Prince i'd probably be Bal (or maybe Boethia).
      
      Thanks hon!