You just need to have two saved games. One at the start when they are both alive, and one once you reach Kirkwall. You then use a GFF editor to copy the deceased sibling from the first save, and paste them into the current save. There are some very important extra steps to take, ie. some character settings (whether they are active etc.) need to be altered in the current save game. You can even take them both into the Deep Roads, but the surviving sibling will still be bound by the Deep Roads story (they die if you don't take Anders, become a Grey Warden if you do). This, too, can be overcome if you make them inactive non-party members just before leaving the Deep Roads.
Note that the game does not recognise the deceased sibling as being alive, so you may get some... odd conversations. Nothing game breaking, though. You also MUST remove the surviving sibling from your party (if you have added them after chapter 1) at the appropriate time when you are set to meet them again in act 3.
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Note that the game does not recognise the deceased sibling as being alive, so you may get some... odd conversations. Nothing game breaking, though. You also MUST remove the surviving sibling from your party (if you have added them after chapter 1) at the appropriate time when you are set to meet them again in act 3.